When I read about singer Katy Perry planning to give her brand-new fiancee, Russell Brand, a lilac Bentley for Valentines Day, I thought, “wooah, there, girl!”

They got engaged very romantically on the Full Moon of New Year’s Eve in India after dating since only September 2009.

Whichever way you cut it, after barely five months, they still don’t know each other very well. Yeah, yeah in THAT sense but it takes time for a person’s chart to unfold.

The strongest aspects around their chart have to do with Uranus (no jokes, please) which indicate sudden, enormous attraction, crackling electricity, independence, unconventionality, friendship, but also a definite on-off quality to their relationship.

The sign your Jupiter is in is where you find fun, joy, generosity, and optimism. Katy has hers in Capricorn. While the Mars-Jupiter conjunction that she has is renowned for being super-impulsive (compulsive, even), Capricorn is not known for being splashy with money and prefers to climb the career ladder, building a solid reputation. She also has the Sun, Moon and Mercury in Scorpio which means she is completely passionate - yet also highly strategic.

While I don’t doubt she fancies Russell’s pants off (his Mars in Aries trines her Venus in Sagittarius - lovely for a romantic, sexual attraction), she’s no fool and knows her flamboyant gesture would get publicised (which kinda ruins the surprise for him).

I’m not convinced that these guys can make it last the distance however. Russell has his Moon, Mars and Jupiter in Aries which means he feels, acts and has fun spontaneously. Plus he’s a Gemini and boy, are they hard to tie down! Katy’s more of a planner so his impulsive proposal may come unstuck as transiting Jupiter and Uranus in Aries (mid-year), Pluto in Capricorn and Saturn in Libra hit their charts over the next couple of years.

Better keep the receipt for the Bentley!!!

Cyber Monday is the five-year-old phenomenon attributed to online retailers who feature amazing sales on the Monday following Thanksgiving. The day after Thanksgiving (always on a Thursday) is the curiously-named Black Friday which is the Day From Hell at bricks-and-mortar stores and malls when shoppers beat each other to death over a pair of shoes on sale (I’m joking…just).

Cyber Monday (this year on 30 November) avoids the hysterics, allowing you to shop online at home (or at work when your boss’s back is turned). There is even an official Cyber Monday website for shoppers where you can make enormous savings on their Christmas gift purchases.

However, on 30 November, Mercury in Sagittarius is squaring Uranus in Pisces. Mercury rules communication, Uranus (electronics), Sagittarius (travel and publishing) and Pisces (glamour and escapism). Mercury is a trickster at the best of times and Uranus is renowned for shocking and upsetting people.

People shopping online for electronics (ranging from mobile phones , iPhones and printers through to massive plasma TVs) could purchase a too-good-to-be-true deal on Cyber Monday. The product may have to be returned for repairs, it may fail to do what it’s supposed to do or it just doesn’t work with your existing electronic items (ie they’re now obsolete).

Others may receive an email promotion which has - disappointingly - already ended by the time they get to checkout or that the products are already out of stock. Yet more may be alarmed to find that their computer goes down which prevents them from shopping. And other people may be shocked to discover a bill they weren’t expecting has emptied their bank and/or credit card accounts, thus making it impossible for them to shop online.

If you shop on Cyber Monday, make sure the store has secure-socket layer (SSL) technology, a phone number you can actually call to speak to someone (not those websites with only email fields in the Contact Us section), and a money-back guarantee.

If your favourite Virgo is celebrating his or her birthday, I hope you’ve marked it in your diary/Outlook calendar, have left enough time to get their present there on time AND call them on the day. Well, they would do it for you! Most Virgos have an amazing memory and mentally file away everyone’s birthdays, anniversaries etc so they can deliver a gift on YOUR day. You might be surprised to know that they’re secretly wounded by people forgetting their birthday and quietly, desperately need you to prove that they’re special.

So, what to get them? One of the nicest things you can give them is a break from the housework that they tend to feel overwhelmed by. When too much is going on in their lives - and it has been thanks to Saturn in Virgo putting immense pressure on them since August 2007 not to mention Uranus in Pisces freaking them right out with undependable partners - they tend to clean, polish, sweep, vacuum, scrub, and wash etc to get some sense of order back. So as you might imagine, they have been cleaning up a storm for a couple of years…Give them a well-deserved break.

They also love a good de-cluttering. They have Pisces on the seventh house of relationships which can make them hate to throw things away that their loved ones have given them and have Sagittarius on the fourth house of home and family which suggests they live with complete grots (sorry, disorganised people). Call in the professional organisers - it will make them silly with happiness!

Saturn in your own sign is, shall we say, a little heavy-going on one’s self-esteem and attitudes towards one’s looks. Is it time for a professional stylist to freshen up their look with more flattering clothes, a haircut or better make-up choices? They just lurrve those makeover shows!

Pluto in Capricorn entered their solar fifth house of love and creativity in January 2009 and will be there until 2024. Pluto rules Scorpio so anything that promotes a bit of lovin’ and kissin’ - can you babysit the kids for the weekend? - is ideal. Virgos love step-by-step manuals and since there are all sorts of interesting how-to books to do with lovemaking, this could be a a naughty thrill!

Jupiter is in Aquarius is their sixth house of work and health until January 2010. Jupiter is what you find fun. Personally I’d like to steer away the emphasis from work for Virgo - it’s waaaay too easy for them to be workaholics - so please don’t give them leather-bound diaries or desk organisers - yuck! Springing for some new bookshelves for their home office - the Expedit ones from IKEA are very popular - might be OK, as might picking up a cute little handbag-sized laptop for them.

Or let’s consider the health side of things. Perhaps you could spring for a personal trainer, a new gym membership, some cute workout clothes, the Low GI Diet book, a delivery of fresh fruit and vegies, or at least a good, deep Swedish massage. The sixth house also rules pets. Have they been pressing their nose up against the puppies’ window at the local pet store or RSPCA? If a little doggie or kitty-kat could fit into their lifestyle, a pet could make a wonderful surprise gift.

Books are also pretty well-received. Since they love to know how things work and what makes people tick, why not check out the latest round of self-help/inspirational books?

Mariah Carey has put in an undisclosed offer on the world’s most expensive mansion, Fleur de Lys in Beverly Hills, ahead of her birthday on 27 March, letting one real estate agent retire immediately.

Listed at $US125 million, the 15-bedroom pile is inspired by the Vaux le Vicomte palace outside Paris. Mariah and her new husband, rapper Nick Cannon like that there is “nothing to do” to the home which features Italian marble walls, French limestone floors, gold-embossed leather wall coverings, gold-leaf crown mouldings, two kitchens and a screening room for 50.

Mariah’s a super-competitive Aries with Mercury (communication) and Venus (love, beauty) also in Aries which can make for a real look-at-moi! behaviour.

With her Mars (drive, energy) in Taurus (money, possessions, music), conjuncting a super-driven Saturn (fears, insecurities, weaknesses to be overcome) also in Taurus which in turn opposes a spending-knows-no-bounds Jupiter in Scorpio, this is a classic combination of never knowing when enough’s enough.

In September 2010, transiting Saturn in Libra will oppose her natal Sun in Aries and conjunct her natal Uranus in Libra which could mean a lot of stomping around on those marble floors for her and Nick. Luckily, they have a lot of bedrooms in which to sulk.

In the meantime, they’ll probably have to buy a lot of furniture to fill up all those rooms. With her Venus in Aries and Moon in Scorpio combination (you look at the Venus and Moon signs in decorating choices - I’m guessing Nick won’t get much of a choice), she’ll want decor that evokes drama, sex, even more gold and “I’m ready for my close-up” mirrors everywhere. I’m also expecting a lot of leopard print.

Her poor friends! It’s not like you could turn up with a pot plant as a housewarming gift.

If you’re a keen shopper and like to buy gifts for anniversaries, birthdays, Easter, Mothers Day, Fathers Day, Halloween, Christmas (any gift excuse at all, really) throughout the year (ahem, like me), Sunday 22 March is a GREAT day to buy electronic items with the very helpful Mercury conjunct Uranus in Pisces aspect.

This is ideal for finding unexpected bargains in those JB Hi-Fi/Apple/Radio Shack type places full of electronic gizmos and I’m sure you’ll find a) a salesperson jumping out of their skin to give you a bargain, b) something new and amazing to impress your gift recipient (that is, if you can keep your cotton-pickin’ hands off it before you get home), or c) both.

Try your luck in the morning up until lunchtime while the aspect stays strong.

PS You know how there always seems to be a Star Trek convention on somewhere in the world? Today would be ideal for it. And it just so happens to be James T.Kirk’s (aka William Shatner/Denny Crane’s) birthday which seems very fitting.

Gifts and inheritances - as well as deceased estates -  attract capital gains tax in Australia. and death duties in other countries.

I was thinking about Australian businessman James Packer who inherited the very weighty gift of a multi-billion-dollar estate by his father, the late Kerry Packer when he died on Boxing Day, 2006.

Like other mutable signs this year (Gemini, Virgo, Sagittarius and Pisces) born in 8-18 March, June, September or December,  Virgo James is being affected by the Saturn in Virgo-Uranus in Pisces opposition. Unlike other signs, he also has a lot more to lose - billions, in fact.

On Today Tonight, they profiled the progress of his Crown Casino in Macau, and his yet-to-be-finalised City of Dreams Casino opposite. It seems the only thing that is being hammered is his super-sized wallet. Building has paused thanks to the global financial crisis, and China is cracking down on the exit of funds from its banks.

James has natal Jupiter (fun, generosity, enthusiasm) in Leo (love, children, recreation and gambling). He is a generous-spirited man who really puts his heart into his pet projects. While he is not a actual gambler like his famous Sagittarian Dad, he IS gambling on the casino being a huge financial success.

In February, transiting Neptune (illusions, glamour and addictions) opposed his natal Jupiter suggesting there are elements to his massive casino project that he’s not aware of. In mid-April, his natal Jupiter will oppose transiting Jupiter in Aquarius. Jupiter rarely knows when to say no and stop which suggests his exuberance for the project may get him in trouble.  He could easily “go for broke”.

Also in February, his natal Pluto (power, obsessions, taboos) conjuncted with transiting Saturn (the stern school principal/cop/grumpy grandfather of the zodiac). It’s likely people behind the scenes were warning him to stop or at least reduce his expansion plans (or were secretly undermining his ability to succeed). As Saturn is retrograde until 19 May, he can ”look forward to” a re-run of this in August when Saturn has retraced its steps.

This month, James is also currently being hammered by transiting Saturn in Virgo conjuncting his natal Sun (a prime time when everyone wags their finger at you disapprovingly),  and Uranus in Pisces opposing his ntal Sun (making him incredibly impatient to be independent and blast his own course).

It’s hard enough right now to be a mid-month-born mutable sign, feeling frustrated or disappointed thanks to the lingering Saturn-Uranus opposition effect, but when you’re a famous figure like him with all the world able to see and judge your mistakes, my bet is he cannot WAIT for 2009 to be over.