Not that I’m a travel agent, but if I was, there are some holidays I know certain Sun signs would love to take – or better yet, receive as an anniversary, birthday, Christmas or wedding gift!

So when I saw that Fairmont Hotels and Resorts had recently launched their Apprentice Trips program, which combines their globally famous luxury brand with a range of accommodation-based activities that relate directly to the culture or landscape of the locale, and, with hotels in 16 different countries, well, that’s a lot of “experiential” packages to choose from.

Talkative Geminis keen to parlez avec vous might enjoy booking the seven-night French Immersion Package at the historic Chateau in Quebec City while environmentally-aware Aquarians could rush for the Eco-Learning Package at the Faimont Kea Lani in Maui. They can choose from one of five eco-learning activities at the resort, which include organic farming in a rainforest, and helping to preserve Hawaii’s archaeological sites by planting native species, among others.

Cancerians may either thrill to Shop With Chef at local markets in Toronto while enjoying a two-night stay at the Fairmont Royal York, or harvesting and hands-on cooking of ingredients from the Secret Garden package in the Fairmont Singapore.

No need for Taureans to book in overnight for the four-hour-plus Sweet Designs package at the Fairmont Pacific Rim in Vancouver – they can have their chocolate (or cake) – and eat it too.

Virgo golfing nuts might enjoy a Tees to Greens stay at the Fairmont Scottsdale where they receive helpful golfing techniques and a behind-the-scenes look at how golf courses are kept so pristine!

In the United Arab Emirates, the Fairmont Bab Al Bahr offers a four-night package for guests to master the regal skill of falconry (the falcon is the UAE’s national bird). I can see this appealing to Leos who think they’re a bit sheik.

In Monte Carlo, guests interested in perfume and exotic oils can broaden their knowledge with the Magic of Aromachology Package, which also includes a 60-minute aromachology massage for two. Wonderful for Pisces.

Librans can choose from taking their favourite best friend with them to Fairmont Turnberry Isle in Miami for the Gal Pal Experience, learning how to do proper back rubs, facials and foot massages, or to learn The Art of Buying Art at the Fairmont Dallas. Since they have a keen eye for art, this one might appeal.

Novice hikers and mountaineers can head to the Fairmont Yangcheng Lake resort in Kunshan, China for the Adventure Awaits package. Gotta-be-first Aries and explorer-mad Sagittarians would love to try this out!

Even politics gets a look-in, with the How to Pass a Bill in Washington Package at the Fairmont, Washington D.C., where a Federally registered lobbyist will advise participants on the crafting and promoting of an agenda. Constitutionally, a bill only requires three steps to become law in the US. Who would have thought that first step could take place while you were on holidays? This is just perfect for power-broking Scorpios and Capricorns.

Hmmm, I really debated about including this info…

Anyway, you know how some people are well, “shit” gift-givers – well it seems that singer Ke$ha is, as well, literally.

Anyone who she considers to have wronged her in some way can expect a nicely gift-wrapped piece of dog poo in the mail for Christmas. These charming little stink bombs are courtesy of the singer’s dogs, although whether the gifts are sent with the dogs’ permission is not known.

Ke$ha had no qualms spilling the beans about this, so to speak, and she admitted that she sometimes uses her music as retaliation towards other wrongdoers. It’s hard to decide which would be worse – to receive a box of doggie doo in the privacy of your own letterbox or to have your transgression recorded for public posterity in a song.

Ke$ha is a Pisces, with Mercury (communication) and Jupiter (optimism, generosity) in Pisces. Normally this would make you rather forgiving, sweet and compassionate and highly aware of karma - especially against wrong-doers.

Unfortunately she has Mars (anger, energy) in Taurus (nature) opposite Pluto (power, taboos) in Scorpio (sex, death, destruction). When someone gets on her bad side she goes well, ape-shit, taking the particularly revengeful route of sending dog poo which would be an upsetting and disgusting gift for anyone.  

Of course, there’s always a positive spin for everything, and perhaps we should be congratulating Ke$ha for switching to gifts that are environmentally-friendly, sustainable and green.

Or in this case, brown.

When I read about singer Katy Perry planning to give her brand-new fiancee, Russell Brand, a lilac Bentley for Valentines Day, I thought, “wooah, there, girl!”

They got engaged very romantically on the Full Moon of New Year’s Eve in India after dating since only September 2009.

Whichever way you cut it, after barely five months, they still don’t know each other very well. Yeah, yeah in THAT sense but it takes time for a person’s chart to unfold.

The strongest aspects around their chart have to do with Uranus (no jokes, please) which indicate sudden, enormous attraction, crackling electricity, independence, unconventionality, friendship, but also a definite on-off quality to their relationship.

The sign your Jupiter is in is where you find fun, joy, generosity, and optimism. Katy has hers in Capricorn. While the Mars-Jupiter conjunction that she has is renowned for being super-impulsive (compulsive, even), Capricorn is not known for being splashy with money and prefers to climb the career ladder, building a solid reputation. She also has the Sun, Moon and Mercury in Scorpio which means she is completely passionate – yet also highly strategic.

While I don’t doubt she fancies Russell’s pants off (his Mars in Aries trines her Venus in Sagittarius – lovely for a romantic, sexual attraction), she’s no fool and knows her flamboyant gesture would get publicised (which kinda ruins the surprise for him).

I’m not convinced that these guys can make it last the distance however. Russell has his Moon, Mars and Jupiter in Aries which means he feels, acts and has fun spontaneously. Plus he’s a Gemini and boy, are they hard to tie down! Katy’s more of a planner so his impulsive proposal may come unstuck as transiting Jupiter and Uranus in Aries (mid-year), Pluto in Capricorn and Saturn in Libra hit their charts over the next couple of years.

Better keep the receipt for the Bentley!!!

Some Sun signs luvrrve Valentines Day and all its romantic trappings (guess who?!) while others loathe it. How does your partner react to Valentines Day?

If they’re a typical:

Aries – they could be all hot and heavy, keen and ardent (especially if you have other suitors after you) or frankly selfish and ignore the whole day if you’ve been together for years. They tend to do things in a rush so they might pick up a bunch of flowers and a box of Cadbury Roses from the service station at the last minute.

Taurus – they tend to like doing the same things, over and over and over. If you received roses last year, it’s a pretty good bet you’ll get ‘em this year too. Got a favourite restaurant?  You could well be there too on the day. Most Taureans like floral fragrances, on the sweet side, such as magnolia. Anything that affects their five senses is off to a good start.

Gemini – they love surprises and novelty. They may start the day off with a cute text message or love note on your pillow. They can write fantastic love letters when they’re in the mood. These are the ones who may surprise you with one of those personalised novels with both of you starring in it. Then again these are the guys who will make light of your 50-year marriage with a joke card.

Cancer – male Cancers feel put-upon and obligated to “do” Valentines Day, grumbling it’s all a commercial exercise. Female Cancers are devastated if their mate forgets or organises nothing and will hold a grudge for the following week. No money? Cook ‘em a wonderful meal at home.

Leo – I hope you have some money if you’re with a Leo! Only the best will do, thanks. Valentines Day is your chance (along with their birthday, anniversary, Christmas.. you get the idea) to prove how much you worship (sorry, LOVE) them. While Valentines Day falls on a Sunday this year, they are especially happy if their colleagues go green with envy as a courier delivers a glorious package/hamper etc to them at work.

Virgo – you can probably save your money if you’re with a Virgo as they’re most likely to see it as corny, demeaning and a waste of money. That said though, if you do a load of washing, the dishes, some vacuuming and the bathroom that will put them in the mood for a bit of loving’ and squeezin’ faster than any box of candy will.

Libra – pull out all the stops, guys. I know Valentines Days falls during Sun in Aquarius, but really, this is Libra’s day! Whether you’re giving them chocolates, flowers, jewellery, lingerie, perfume, personalised romantic gifts, a restaurant dinner, weekend away or all of the above, don’t stint – and don’t ignore them.

Scorpio – the types of gifts Scorpios like to receive aren’t the ones I can publish here… Do nothing however and watch out!

Sagittarius – they love chocolate, laugh at lingerie and tend to lose jewellery, so if you can wing it, give them a weekend away where you can explore something. Both sexes see themselves as adventurers so try something new.

Capricorns – female Capricorns are curiously sensitive to time passing and often put arbitrary deadlines on things ie Christmas – met the parents. New Year’s – decided to move in. Valentines Day – proposal??? This is a good time to let them know where they stand. Married Capricorns like to discuss plans for the future too. Oh, and a little bauble from Tiffany’s doesn’t hurt.

Aquarius – again, this is another bunch who find the concept icky. They’re most likely to arrange a casual BBQ with friends, taking particular care to invite those who are single so no-one feels left out. If you arrange anything, make it novel and unique.

Pisces – these guys are romantics on par with Librans. If you make no effort only to discover they’ve arranged some magical day for you, they will be crushed. Their ability to express their deepest feelings for you is touching – and memorable. While I wouldn’t normally recommend giving pets as gifts, these are the ones who would go ga-ga over a new puppy, kitten, hamster or school of goldfish. They keep all their cards and gifts from exes so ask them casually what their favourite gift was as it will give you a clue.

People love receiving personalised gifts as it makes them feel special and cherished.

But unless you have a rough idea of what the item’s going to look like, you can worry that you’ve got the spelling right, ticked the right colour or even the correct size.

There are quite a few websites now which provide real-time personalisation so that you can see a mock-up of what your completed gift would look like. Here’s some of my favourites:

American Medical ID – great for family members who may have a serious condition, you can “engrave” in real-time a necklace or bracelet from 14kt, 10kt, sterling silver or stainless steel, and it has engraving samples and tips so you know what to add. If your mum or grandmother is a Cancer, this might stop them worrying.

Just for fun, create a magazine cover with their photo, the theme (ie wedding, anniversary, new baby) and magazine-style headlines ie “6 Things You Never Knew About Samantha and John” or whatever. Perfect for Aries and Leos.

If you really know their favourite colours for their lips, eyes, nails and blush, you can custom-blend cosmetics for them, even including the colour intensity and exras like shimmering glitter for nail polish. Even better, you can send in your old, discontinued favourite lipstick or nail polish etc and get them to colour-match it for you! A lovely gift idea for Taureans and Librans.

One of the most imaginative customised gift websites I’ve ever seen is Shapeways which lets you create 3D printing of your designs. You could have the words of a favourite poem, for example, laser-cut into a candle-holder or into cool napkin rings which would have to be one of the most amazing Valentines Day, anniversary or wedding gifts ever!

Hardcover photo books are not really that new now but Pixable lets you select your photos from Facebook, Flickr or your computer, upload AND receive them within 3 days! Great for Geminis.

For the aviation buff who has nearly everything, you can order a customised airline cart (yes, the trolleys that the hosties roll down the aircraft aisle) from Alcarts in one of 10 colours. Ideal for those with their own plane(!), this storage item is also an original conversation piece as you serve food and beverages in your office, garage, patio, shop or kitchen. I can see this appealing to Aquarians and Sagittarians!

Everyone loves their own name! A cute gift for a new baby or perhaps a housewarming gift is letter art photography by Alphabet Photography. Each “letter” is a photo of an everyday object (such as a door handle) that resembles the letter of the alphabet. A sweet gift for a Pisces as is this one from GrowShow which lets you upload photos in chronological order so you can see the development of your child over time. It also has interlocking photo frames so you can add to them as your child gets older.

Love to theme a party all the way through? Now you can personalise your disposable party plates with photos, text and colour for anniversaries, birthdays, Halloween, with a fun service from Hallmark. I see this being particularly popular for children’s parties!

Candles are always popular with women and now you can customise them with Lumnique, packaged in a nice rectangular glass jar. Select the intention ie peace, love etc, the colour and from 72 fragrances, ranging from the traditional, such as rose, to the frankly unusual, such as Hansel and Gretel (which I’m guessing must smell like gingerbread)!

If you’re looking for a gift with a difference for your favourite health freak, look no further. Now you can customise your own energy bars (chewy, oaty, cripsy), add fruits, nuts and sweets (ranging from chocolate chips to maple syrup), and even fibre or other nutrients, all the while seeing the nutritional panel adjust in real time for sugar, fat, carbohydrate etc. And to cap it off, you can even have your name on the packaging – how cool is that?! I’m going to order some from Element Bars for my Virgo sister!

Most people are familiar with the Successories framed prints in gift shops full of inspirational photos and sayings. Now you can customise your own, using their gallery of images but adding your own message. I think a subversive-style message (ie a straight picture and a sarcastic message) could really amuse a Scorpio, and maybe some Capricorns…

I love the mobile phone covers by GelaSkins – they’re amazing! From manga cartoons to Botticelli’s Birth of Venus, you’re sure to find something amazing here. Most importantly, you can upload your own photos, message and designs to cover covers for your mobile, iPod, laptop, gaming device or Kindle which would impress even the hardest-to-please teen.

If you find clothes hard to fit and you’re forever getting items altered, you might like to check out the customised outfits at April Marin. They make a small range of pretty, tailor-made dresses, allowing you to customise the lengths and widths of everything important!

Does your favourite friend or family member post particularly witty bon mots on Twitter? Did you know that Tweetbookz now lets you create high-quality books containing Tweets from any Twitter account? It might be a lovely gift for a small business owner! 

And last, but certainly not least, I was entranced by Princess Chic which enables you to build your own pair of shoes! From classic stilettos and platform pumps to ballet flats and high-heeled sandals, you can select your material from leather, satin, suede, snake, croc or fish skins, from 17 colours and sizes from 5-11.

According to the wedding gurus at GetMarried, the US holiday season between Thanksgiving (the last Thursday in November) through to Valentines Day is the most popular season for engagements with approximately 35-40% (or 550,00-650,000 couples) getting married in the 12-18 months afterwards.

Here are their top 10 bridal trend predictions for 2010. Some of them are frankly, a little weird, but there are a few others which could be added to a novel gift registry, especially if you need help with wedding expenses.

1. Non-linear wedding aisle.
Well marriage is hardly linear, more of a game of Twister and Monopoly with a Get Out Of Jail Free card so maybe that’s the idea? Or is it to be photographed on your best angle? I truly doubt this one will take off… If it does, a Gemini, Scorpio or Aquarius would be the most likely candiate.

2. Comfort foods
When the economy tanks, everyone wants to go back to basics which is great news for your wallet (although maybe not your waistline). Why not consider adding your catering bill to your gift registry, ask Uncle Tim to share some of his dusty bottles in the cellar or have your aunt make the cupcakes. And everyone really does love chicken. Comfort foods are nirvana to Taureans and Cancerians.

3.  Gifting techie gadgetry
Technology is a tricky one because it becomes obsolete so quickly, making your friends and family waste their money on something you can’t keep. Whatever PDA, iPhone or other techie gadget you get in 2010 is unlikely to be any use in say 2015.  However, for the retro girl/guy marrying that iPod addict, why not consider buying software that convert records to a digital file? One for the Aquarians.

4. Texture-inspired invitations
Embossed, die-cut and engraved invitations are the go for 2010 as they’re supposed to mimic your wedding decor. Unfortunately the bride will be the only one who notices the seamless theming. Yes, you could ask for someone to pay for your invites as their gift to you but um, don’t. This trend could suit the Virgos.

5. Cobalt blue
This colour is set to be the hottest colour for brides in 2010. And in about oh, 10 years or so when everyone looks at your bridesmaids in this electrically charged 80s colour (I was very fond of it myself then), they will laugh. What about keeping it to gifts like vases, table linen, candlesticks, picnicware, or cushion covers? I see this one suiting fun-loving Sagittarius.

6. Wear-again bridesmaid dresses
I like this trend. Whether you or your bridesmaids are paying for their dresses, it’s nice to think the frocks will get some wear again, like regifting…Pisces are super-sentimental and will appreciate this one.

7. Three-dimensional save-the-dates
Here’s they’re talking about items like paper umbrellas to signify a destination wedding. This is where you might want to add honeymoon excursions and attractions to your gift registry. Or even a B&B gift certificate for when you get home and feel a bit anti-climactic. Sagittarius again.

8. Old Hollywood glam for men
Think Cary Grant – even George Clooney. If your man doesn’t have a good pair of shoes, why not put that in your wedding gift registry. He will have them for years! This will thrill the Librans and Leos.

9. Blogger brides
Blogging about your wedding planning is becoming surprisingly common. If you’re a techie yourself, maybe you could give her free hosting, cool apps or a hand at programming as your wedding gift? If they can make their blog into a money-making exercise, this trend might suit Capricorn while Gemini might try it just for fun.

10. Personalised everything
Last, but definitely not least, brides want a wedding which is completely customised for them, from personalised invitations, monogrammed guest books, and made-to-order favours to gifts which are all about the couple.  Some of these things are fun but just add to the cost of your wedding. In addition to the array of personalised homewares and books you could ask for, I think a personalised set of cards and envelopes embossed with your names and address would be a nice addition to your gift registry. And you just know your aunt would buy it as that would give you the stationery on which to write your thank you cards! This trend will suit Aries, Leo and Libra (who likes everything matching).

When Miranda Hobbes in Sex And The City goes shopping for a Halloween outfit with Carrie, she exclaims, “There’s only two types of outfits for women: witch or sex kitten.”

In what is no coincidence, Halloween occurs during the Sun in Scorpio period. Many Scorpio women do delight in being a kind of witch, seeing the unseen that others miss - such as through astrology, numerology, psychology, even witchcraft if it’ll get her what she wants - and when she’s swings over to her sex kitten role, she’s rather fond of biology, too (hee hee)!

Scorpio men and women love to know what makes people tick - but they  don’t always want you to know what’s going on with them! You are either in their Inner Circle (one or two best friends, certain family members plus their partner) or you are not. If not, this is the one sign who couldn’t care less if you don’t give them a gift, or even wish them happy birthday on the day. If you do, these paranoid androids wonder what you want from them…

But even if you are in the inner circle of intimates (they take soooooo long to trust people completely), they’ll then analyse what the gift you gave them really means! Both sexes have something they’re completely passionate (ie obsessive) about. If you know your Scorpio you’ll know what that topic is, so they appreciate your gestures towards supporting their hobby (yes, it’s usually sex but something else as well).

You also get points for getting them anything that’s a little bit contraband or requires you to know someone who knows someone to get it. They can’t bear it when people pry into their affairs so if you give them one of those prepaid Visa gift cards, they can happily use it (on God knows what) knowing that you’ll be none the wiser on what they bought.

Scorpio men like books/DVDs with plenty of raunchy sex in it – they typically love James Bond (although he’s now a bit soft, only sleeping with a couple of women per story compared to Sean Connery’s heydays) – and unauthorised biographies (they have more dirt, see) on powerful people, especially billionaires, powerful criminals, sleazy politicians and influential rock stars.

Scorpio women appeciate stuff which highlights their sex appeal. It could be a sultry new perfume, killer pair of heels or some erotic underwear that’s probably best not hung out on the clothesline.

If you’re surprising your partner on a romantic weekend away, make sure it’s an adults-only resort. In fact, anything adults-only is just about right…

Once you’ve chalked up nearly two years of marriage, you graduate from the first paper wedding anniversary gifts and onto the potentially more expensive cotton gifts.

The common thread (ahem) for cotton gifts seems to be mainly homewares or clothing-related items, but you can still have some fun with them!

The ones that caught my eye were the customised queen-size duvet cover (Aries lurrrve personalised gifts) that you can personalise with your own photo (or from the photo gallery) from Vision Bedding or if your partner hogs the bed, you can draw the line who sleeps where – literally with Bedhog.com’s His and Hers sheet sheet (Geminis love a good gag gift) or if you’re after a “classier” cotton-themed present, give them a monogrammed cotton throw from The Golden Ribbon (ideal for your Capricorn or Taurus).

If you happen to be buying a second wedding anniversary gift for say, your best friend and don’t want it to be about their bedlinen, some nice thirsty towels would do the trick!

Have your favourite photo printed on cotton canvas (Leos will be delighted) or what about getting him a custom-made cotton business shirt (great for Virgos) or a fun t-shirt about your second wedding anniversary (Aquarians aren’t that mushy). Or snuggle up together in a comfortable cotton hammock (ideal for dreamy Pisces or sexy Scorpios) after he’s fired up the BBQ (especially if he’s a Sagittarius)…

And what girl doesn’t love a pretty broderie anglaise cami! (Cancers and Librans adore them.)

If you’ve got a diamond ring burning a hole in your pocket (or just the urge to propose), Wednesday 28 October 2009 is a lovely day to get down on a bended knee to pop the question!

Venus (the Goddess of Love and Beauty) will be in Libra (the sign of balance, harmony and relationships) which will make a gorgeous trine to Jupiter (the Santa Claus of the zodiac) in Aquarius (friends, hopes and wishes) that day. There is probably no other combination as romantic, lucky, prosperous, abundant and joyous as this aspect!

On the same day there is also Mercury (communication) in Scorpio (sex, insight, psychology) sextiling Pluto (the planet of transformation) in Capricorn (stability, longevity, conservatism). This combination is fantastic for putting a metaphorical jigsaw puzzle together in a long-term way. Hopefully you are the one who “completes” them.

Plus, Saturn (the Pillar of the Community guy) moves into Libra (see above) the very next day. He WANTS you to get married and to make a commitment! How cool is that?!

Not every Sun sign is gleeful at getting a silly gag gift for their birthday, some are downright disappointed and disgusted that you could get it so wrong!

Aries have a very healthy ego so while they hate to be made to look stoopid, they (and Leos) do like to be seen as heroes. A fake Oscar-type statue for the “Best…” would appeal as would superhero outfits, James Bond type gadgets and stuff that appeals to the child in them.

Taureans lurrve food and this is one area where you could have fun (with them). They have an “earthy” approach to life so if you combine one of their favourite foods – chocolate – in the shape of their favourite umm, bodily organs, you could be onto a winner. Libras would be quietly appalled, however.

Geminis and Sagittarians have low attention spans and love silly, frankly childish birthday gifts, especially ones which startle others, eg whoopee cushions, stink bombs etc.

Cancerians are most likely to be very upset if it’s tasteless as they’re such sensitive little souls, but don’t mind gentle humour, especially if it’s got a cute connection with home and family. Fridge stickers, embroidered pillows with cute sayings are well-received.

Neither Virgos nor Capricorns are famous for slapping their thighs upon receiving gag gifts, unfortunately. Since they’re so work-obsessed, office gags can amuse Virgos (slightly). Money-related gags can sometimes tickle Capricornian funny bones, but only if they’ve got a couple of Sagittarius planets in their chart!

Librans are completely freaked out by fake vomit, replica poo and so on (whereas that doesn’t faze the Scorpios one bit). If it’s a gag, it has to be tasteful. Hard, I know! Scorpios also like rather naughty, sexy gag gifts as they like being seen as complete sex maniacs.

Aquarians love electronic gizmos and things that shock others. Anything faintly Star Trek-y or out of this world or that appeals to their love of humanity could work.

Pisces swing from extreme bad taste to high ‘n’ mighty puritanicalism. It depends on their mood. Since they’re famed for their uh, drinking, gags which celebrate this particular vice can amuse them. Pisces also rules illusion, so magic tricks can work their ahem, magic, too.