Now that Valentine’s Day has passed, the roadside rose vendors have disappeared, the black velvet jewellery boxes have been stashed away in the vaults and those ENORMOUS white teddy bears have been put away somewhere (where on earth do they fit - and more importantly why on earth would anyone buy one?), some couples may be reassessing their relationships.

One cheery little infidelity expert from New York, Ruth Houston, has come out to suggest a number of ways to tell if your partner cheated on Valentine’s Day. I think in fact this could also include Christmas Day based on what she says.

1. “Discovered” gifts disappear
Remember the awful scene in Love, Actually when Emma Thompson opens the little white box containing the gold heart necklace, thinking that’s what her husband Alan Rickman has bought for her for Christmas? And then she gets a pathetic Joni Mitchell CD while the flirty skank at work gets the expensive necklace? If you find something “gift-y” before Valentine’s Day and then don’t get it, ask some questions…

2. Receipts for same, identical, or non-received gifts
Paper trails undo presidents, criminals and cheating partners alike. If you find a receipt for say TWO identical lingerie sets but receive only one, someone has the other set (and at best, your husband likes dressing up).

Got chocolate? But the receipt was for a bracelet? Uh-oh.

Does the hotel or restaurant receipt say 13 February but you KNOW you were in bed alone with a cold and your partner had a business meeting interstate? Right. On a Saturday night. Did you know that Ruth nicknames 13 February as Mistress Day???

3. Thank note, email or text
If your spouse or partner has received or sent a thank-you message for a gift you know nothing about, them’s warning bells…And hey, especially if they’re normally an ungrateful sod.

4.  Oh honey, I’ve had this for years
Many women (and some men) avoid discussions about their spending habits but protesting, “”Oh, this old thing? I’ve had it for years!” and rely on their partner being oblivious so they can get away with maxing out their credit card. But if it’s a particularly nice piece of jewellery, beautiful underwear or even flowers that are waaaay more elaborate than what he/she normally buys turn up just after Valentine’s Day, look out.

It might be innocent (like, you’re such a bad gift-giver that they decided to indulge themselves - and if they did, that’s a clue they’re at least disappointed with your effort this Valentine’s Day/Christmas) or not. Check.

5. Who you gonna call?
If you’re really suspicious check your phone bill or your partner’s outgoing calls/texts on Valentine’s Day. Those made very early in the morning or last thing at night are possible signs.

If you have two or more of these infidelity clues, well, as Ruth’s clients might say, “Houston, we have a problem.”

It’s becoming increasingly common for couples to request cash, not gifts, for their wedding present.

But many guests feel a bit squeamish about handing over cash and many worry that it’s just going to be spent frivolously.

In 1996, the US Federal Housing Administration encourage lenders to offer bridal registry accounts where couples could stash away cash from family and friends towards a loan for their first home.

SunTrust Mortgage, a subsidiary of SunTrust Bank was one lender which created a wedding registry, where guests would make a deposit and the company would notify the bride and groom to let them know. It is such a practical way to help them get a loan together, that it’s surprising that more banks haven’t got in on the act.

A credit union in Los Angeles, Water and Power Community Credit Union (WPCCU) has just launched the MatriMoney wedding registry savings account to help couples get over the (deposit) threshold. They get gift instruction cards to include with their wedding invitations and gift-givers receive acknowledgement cards of their cash gifts once deposited.

Unlike any other wedding gift registry, WPCCU also offers free online financial webinars for newly engaged couples to learn how to budget and manage their money.

I think this could particularly appeal to couples where at least one of them is a security-conscious, long-term planner Taurus, Cancer, Virgo or Capricorn!

Last year, one of my customers bought a LoveStars report for her Australian soldier boyfriend in Iraq - and she said one of the reasons she bought it was because it was all about them as a couple and it was light to mail to him.

So it got me thinking about this Valentines Day. If your partner is in the armed forces in Iraq, Afghanistan or elsewhere in the Middle East, you’ll be wanting to send him or her something that’s suitable (ie pornography of any kind is banned) and also lightweight so it doesn’t cost you a fortune shipping it there! And also something that can make it in time.

There are a number of websites that specialise in presents for those in the military, but here’s 30 gift ideas which could make ideal Valentines Day gifts for your solider boy (or girl)…

Practical Valentines Day gifts
Everyone needs new clothes from time to time and these Bad Booty Wear underpants will hopefully encourage your man not to keep his antique, holey jocks! Cool meat-tray packaging too. Since it’s winter there, some cosy thermal underwear could go down a treat while some men might appreciate military-themed cufflinks. If they get the time for a swim, female officers might like the modest swimwear by HydroChic. Since the war ain’t for sissies, you might find some cool items in the Black Helmet Apparel’s (just the name sounds like tough-guy clothing) website, for them to wear on their days off. Some men might like the new Remington personal groomer with all the attachments for pesky poking-out hair, while the ladies could appreciate the world’s first collagen-infused skin moisturiser (disguised as a candle) which warms the room and softens their skin.

Thoughtful Valentines Day gifts
If they love taking photos and videos, give them the X Shot camera extender so they can finally be in the shot with their buddies! Combat Ready Balm soothes dried-out skin at the end of a tough day. The Porta Pocket lets them carry around their MP3 player or mobile on their days off. If you’d like to give them to chance to buy what they want, give them a gift card to Gift Card Mall which gives them the choice of more than 350 gift cards. I love the frangipani-print portable speakers by Sonoma Living Green which plug into any Mp3 player. Chocolate could melt on the way there but a Tortuga rum cake (with only 0.05% rum content) in that cool pirate-y packaging could make their day. Pewter heart-shaped charms are sweet and light to send. Heart-shaped cookies are a yummy thought. Motomail makes it easy for friends and family members of Marines to write a letter that is downloaded, printed and delivered within 24 hours.

Personalised Valentines Day gifts
If you’re quick, you may be able to order a pretty customised nightgown for your lady. If you want them to “see” you last thing at night, send them a photo night light with a favourite 3×5 photo already it. When they switch it on it illuminates with their image. If your man loves the idea of custom-made shirts, why not get something made for him at Shirts My Way, and send it to him with your love? And if “it’s in your kiss”, send him a cute Kiss Kanvas printed with your own lip-shaped kiss. Who doesn’t love all the amazing flavours at Jelly Belly? If you know his or her favourite flavour (I love watermelon), you can customise a tin just for them, even adding your photo of you two on the lid. Keep everyone close in their thoughts with a customised cover photo book. Or give them a rechargeable USB drive keyring that holds 60 digital photos. Get a dialogue going with fascinating conversation-starters in the Between Me and You relationship keepsake journals. And send ‘em a Valentines Day card with your photo printed on it.

Entertaining Valentines Day gifts
An iTunes card will let them download their favourite songs of course while these cute heart-shaped ear-buds for their iPod are adorable! Does she get time to bake cakes? She might love this super-inexpensive diamond ring-shaped cake tin if you’re engaged. but if they like reading, there are so many books to choose from - Reporting for Doodie (a fun story of a grandmother looking after her grandson while her daughter and son-in-law went off to fight), The Commuter Marriage: Keep Your Relationship Close While You’re Far Apart (which says it all, really), and You’re My Guy Because (which is full of witty reasons you love him).

What Valentines Day gifts are you going to send?

A survey by eBillMe of over 1,200 consumers has found that 57% are looking for something more original than the old Valentines Day gift standbys of flowers and chocolate and they plan to spend an astonishing average of $236 (that can’t be right, can it?! If it is, I’ve been dating the wrong man).

Nearly a quarter (23%) plan to buy it online but with Valentines Day only a couple of weeks away, they’d better get their skates on if they want it delivered in time (ie by Friday 12 February)!

Half the men are unsure what to get their ladies for Valentines Day while a surprisingly high 45% of women don’t know what to get their men. All this dithering around of course means more than a few of them will resort to roses and chocolate…

Here’s some fun Valentines Day gift ideas by Sun sign in case you’re stuck!

If you live in Sydney, Australia or will be travelling there with your partner between now and 31 March 2010, book into the Medusa in trendy Darlinghurst in Sydney.

It’s In The Stars has teamed up with Contemporary Hotels so that guests staying at this contempory luxury boutique hotel can receive a LoveStars astrology report for couples as part of the LoveStars of Medusa package!

Ideal for Valentines Day getaways and anniversary celebrations, you’ll receive one night’s accommodation in a Deluxe room, a LoveStars report (after supplying your birth details), upon arrival, Aveda products in your room, newspaper and Lindt chocolates, complimentary use of Fitness First Gym and Cook & Phillip Pool, late checkout (subject to availability) for just $240 or you can upgrade to a Premium Deluxe room for $290 per night or the Grand room for $340 per night.

What’s the best Valentines Day gift you ever received? The second-best? Third place? And where did you buy it? And who’s the best Sun sign at giving romantic Valentines Day gifts? Will it be a tie between Taurus and Cancer again, who were voted the equal best personalised gift-givers?

Take part in a fun, quick ( it will take less than 2 minutes to complete) survey and you could win one of 5 x LoveStars boxed gift certificates (worth $89 each)!

The Valentines Day Gifts Survey closes 7 February 2010. Good luck!

Whether you’ve got something amazing planned or you’re strapped for cash, you can never have enough romance on Valentine’s Day…

The idea of giving little IOUs for back massages and breakfast-in-bed isn’t new, but the Simply Romantic Ideas blog has created 14 professional-looking coupons featuring a big red rose, that you could print off for free to surprise your beloved.

Ranging from the innocent (”Good for one free home-cooked candlelight dinner”) to the not-so-innocent (”Good for one sexual fantasy come true” - well, I could see trouble ahead with that one…) as well as the potentially ruiniously expensive (”Good for one free day at the spa” - does the man not know he could be up for HUNDREDS of dollars!!! Hmmm - don’t include THAT one if you’re on a budget), you could find something that just adds that little extra to Valentines Day.

Most wedding gift registries tend to specify actual products but a new Canadian one, UponAStar lets you see inside the wishes and dreams of the couple getting married, not how many towels nor knives and forks they need.

It is, in fact, an online “wishing well” asking for money but it’s done so stylishly that guests who normally baulk at being bailed up for cash will enjoy taking part.

UponAStar’s wishes of course, cost money (and they specify how much these “wishes” cost and the quantity they’ll need) but the nice thing about it for many is that it is not “stuff” but memories they can share for always.

Many couples might take the immediate gratification of honeymoon wishes - ie horseriding on the beach, Hawaiian massages, hot air balloon ride or whatever - to enjoy right after the wedding. Others may wish to start a family (many brides these days are super-efficient and are already pregnant at the ceremony), while others may be further along the parenting path and wish for an education fund to put their pre-teens through university. Still others will be in renovation mode and wishing they didn’t have to spend their weekends covered in sawdust but to get a tradie to do some of the work.

You can wish for anything you want of course, but the catch is that you will still have to price it (even approximately) if you are to receive your wish.

According to the wedding gurus at GetMarried, the US holiday season between Thanksgiving (the last Thursday in November) through to Valentines Day is the most popular season for engagements with approximately 35-40% (or 550,00-650,000 couples) getting married in the 12-18 months afterwards.

Here are their top 10 bridal trend predictions for 2010. Some of them are frankly, a little weird, but there are a few others which could be added to a novel gift registry, especially if you need help with wedding expenses.

1. Non-linear wedding aisle.
Well marriage is hardly linear, more of a game of Twister and Monopoly with a Get Out Of Jail Free card so maybe that’s the idea? Or is it to be photographed on your best angle? I truly doubt this one will take off… If it does, a Gemini, Scorpio or Aquarius would be the most likely candiate.

2. Comfort foods
When the economy tanks, everyone wants to go back to basics which is great news for your wallet (although maybe not your waistline). Why not consider adding your catering bill to your gift registry, ask Uncle Tim to share some of his dusty bottles in the cellar or have your aunt make the cupcakes. And everyone really does love chicken. Comfort foods are nirvana to Taureans and Cancerians.

3.  Gifting techie gadgetry
Technology is a tricky one because it becomes obsolete so quickly, making your friends and family waste their money on something you can’t keep. Whatever PDA, iPhone or other techie gadget you get in 2010 is unlikely to be any use in say 2015.  However, for the retro girl/guy marrying that iPod addict, why not consider buying software that convert records to a digital file? One for the Aquarians.

4. Texture-inspired invitations
Embossed, die-cut and engraved invitations are the go for 2010 as they’re supposed to mimic your wedding decor. Unfortunately the bride will be the only one who notices the seamless theming. Yes, you could ask for someone to pay for your invites as their gift to you but um, don’t. This trend could suit the Virgos.

5. Cobalt blue
This colour is set to be the hottest colour for brides in 2010. And in about oh, 10 years or so when everyone looks at your bridesmaids in this electrically charged 80s colour (I was very fond of it myself then), they will laugh. What about keeping it to gifts like vases, table linen, candlesticks, picnicware, or cushion covers? I see this one suiting fun-loving Sagittarius.

6. Wear-again bridesmaid dresses
I like this trend. Whether you or your bridesmaids are paying for their dresses, it’s nice to think the frocks will get some wear again, like regifting…Pisces are super-sentimental and will appreciate this one.

7. Three-dimensional save-the-dates
Here’s they’re talking about items like paper umbrellas to signify a destination wedding. This is where you might want to add honeymoon excursions and attractions to your gift registry. Or even a B&B gift certificate for when you get home and feel a bit anti-climactic. Sagittarius again.

8. Old Hollywood glam for men
Think Cary Grant - even George Clooney. If your man doesn’t have a good pair of shoes, why not put that in your wedding gift registry. He will have them for years! This will thrill the Librans and Leos.

9. Blogger brides
Blogging about your wedding planning is becoming surprisingly common. If you’re a techie yourself, maybe you could give her free hosting, cool apps or a hand at programming as your wedding gift? If they can make their blog into a money-making exercise, this trend might suit Capricorn while Gemini might try it just for fun.

10. Personalised everything
Last, but definitely not least, brides want a wedding which is completely customised for them, from personalised invitations, monogrammed guest books, and made-to-order favours to gifts which are all about the couple.  Some of these things are fun but just add to the cost of your wedding. In addition to the array of personalised homewares and books you could ask for, I think a personalised set of cards and envelopes embossed with your names and address would be a nice addition to your gift registry. And you just know your aunt would buy it as that would give you the stationery on which to write your thank you cards! This trend will suit Aries, Leo and Libra (who likes everything matching).

If one of your Christmas “gifts” to your lover this year is a proposal, you couldn’t go past Wednesday 16 or Thursday 17 December!

Wednesday 16 December features both Sun in Sagittarius sextile Neptune in Aquarius and a New Moon in Sagittarius. Sagittarius rules adventure and exploration (what is more of an adventure in life than getting engaged?) while Aquarius is all about friendship and group activities (just like those pre-wedding parties you’ll have to arrange). Neptune rules compassion, kindness and selflessless. Since a New Moon is a new beginning, it is an auspicious time to become engaged!

Thursday 17 December features Venus in Sagittarius trine Mars in Leo. Venus rules love and relationships while Mars is all about action and sex drive. If your heart thumps for someone and you want to make it official, it’s a beautiful date for ever-lasting romance!

A date while Venus is in Sagittarius responds very well to outdoors action - why not go on an evening picnic, a twlight stroll on the beach, snuggle up watching a movie at Moonlight Cinema (Leo does rule entertainment) or if you’re feeling festive, go to a Christmas night market and have fun kissing under the mistletoe!

And if you’re still shopping for Christmas gifts, do it on 17 December. The Moon is in Capricorn which is not known for its romantic nature, but more for its pragmatism. You may find something that your partner will love - and find it at a reduced rate, too.

If you’re unattached and reading this, join in the fun somewhere on 17 December to mingle with other singles. You might see some fireworks way before New Year’s Eve…