Ever felt a bit down and went straight for foods and other items that are old favourites? And on holidays when you were raring to go you were in the mood to try something something new?

US psychologists have confirmed that people  prefer items which are tried-and-true that they’re already familiar with (this is not the same thing as items that are regifted, though!) when they’re feeling depressed and that they seek novelty and excitement when they’re happy. In fact, familiar experiences and products are boring when people are in a fantastic mood…

University of California, San Diego psychology professor Piotr Winkielman found that the value of familiarity depends on the context. Familiarity infers safety which is ideal when people feel upset (”comfort” foods like chocolate for break-ups, anyone?) but the same-old, same-old becomes borning when all is going well.

In terms of gifts, this means you need to pay careful attention to the mood and the circumstances of the person receiving the gift.

Anniversary gifts - generally a wedding anniversary is a happy time - give them something unusual to spark some excitement!

Bereavement gifts - this is when you turn up with soup, food, a favourite CD or book - no surprises are appreciated.

Birthday gifts - ooooh…. This depends if it’s a birthday they’re looking forward to (which is generally every birthday for people aged under 21) in which case give ‘em some novelty, but if it’s a “milestone”, they might be a bit upset about the perceived passing of time - give them something familiar…

Christmas gifts - even if it never turns out the way you expect, nearly everyone looks forward to Christmas. Novelty works when people are happy which is why Kris Kringles can be a hit (finding all those weird things under $20).

Engagement gifts - again, give them something fun and new to look forward to.

New baby gifts - this depends… Is it a long-awaited first child? Baby gifts that are really unique are ideal. But what about a couple who’ve just discovered they’re about to have twins (and they already have a child or two)? If they’re feeling stressed about the expense and extra responsibility, perhaps you should choose something they already know and like. Like money.

Valentine’s Day gifts - get fresh by keeping it fresh. Nothing makes a romance get boring faster than the same-old flower and chocolate routine.

Wedding gifts - this is traditionally a  very happy time so gifts that are out of the ordinary would be great. Then again if you’re Liz Taylor and you’re marrying yet again, you can add to your place settings.

If you’d like people to be environmentally friendly with their gifts (AND you don’t want the same-old, same-old), you need to create a gift registry populated with items from fair trade stores to ensure that the least energy possible has been used to create your homewares and so on.

You could always register your wedding gifts with online stores which stock eco-friendly items. One of the best-known ones is Viva Terra (all of its products are organic, sustainable, earth-friendly and hand-crafted by artisans) where you can buy bamboo fabric sheets, Adirondack chairs made from reclaimed wood, or copper leaf-shaped night lights, for example.

Greenfeet has a wide range of inexpensive eco-friendly gifts which are guaranteed to be conversation-starters - what about a composting bin, or a vintage pool ball wine bottle stopper?

Others might choose to forego traditional gifts altogether at the cleverly named non-profit organisation Changing The Present. This website encourages you to select gifts from hundreds of non-profit organisations representing over 30 cause categories. Guests simply select the gift which means the most to them and your relationship. You might donate 10 books for a library for $50, or for the same price, teach 100 rural people about financial literacy, or provide a prosthetic limb so someone can learn to walk again.

Thanking people for sending you a gift is THE best way to ensure that they’re willing - even delighted! - to give you more gifts (and not thanking them will offend them no end).

So I was a little surprised to find an article with suggested wording to thank guests for your wedding gift! Interestingly, none of the suggested thank you note “scripts” included a space for the actual gift so you could, in theory, use EXACTLY THE SAME WORDING on everyone’s thank you cards - and no-one would be the wiser! It might take you only a quarter of the time, but it wouldn’t be particularly personal, would it?

If you’re one of the many who use gift registries you could always mention how much you’re looking forward to using the gift they bought off your list (that you chose, don’t forget - so there could be a story behind why you selected it) and how you’ll be thinking of them when you use it. 

Dear [guest name],
We were so delighted to see you at our wedding and we were thrilled that you gave us the [espresso machine/silverware/luggage/hurricane lamps etc] we love so much.

It was so lovely of you and we will think of you when we [drink coffee/have a dinner party/go on holidays/eat outside etc].

We look forward to seeing you again soon.

Love

[you two]

Of course, you might not want to use this format if they gave you bedsheets.

Facebook, Twitter and other social media websites have made it possible for everyone to know about an amazing deal in your neck of the woods or your area of interest.

A number of US social media merchants have sprung up where merchants can entice new customers to try a new product, get an amazing deal on a close-out item or to be one of the first to trial a brand-new service.

The biggest and best-known are Groupon (which pays you $10 if you refer friends), LivingSocial, BuyWithMe and NimbleBuy.

You simply sign up with one or more of them to get daily emailed deals for your city (or for national and/or online-only deals).

Is there a catch? Natch. To make it worth the merchants’ while, they require a minimum number of customers to ”buy in” to the deal. So if you’re keen say to pick up a luxurious massage in Miami or a baby hamper in Baltimore for a ridiculously reduced price, you’ll need a number of others in your area wanting that same thing.

Which is where social media comes in. You Twitter it and/or facebook it like crazy to your mates and get them to pass the word on so you can all benefit from the low, low prices.

This could be great if you’re seeking some bargains on upcoming gifts for an anniversary, birthday, christening, engagement, Mothers’s Day, new baby or wedding gift.

What will they think of next?!

A New Jersey-based company called Cold Cuts Media has created a new iPhone/iPod application called REGIFT that will catalog the gifts you want to pass on. Since two in three adults have regifted at some time (I certainly have), this could prove very useful to keep out sticky social situations (such as eventually giving the gift back to the original gift-giver).

Costing just $0.99 from the ITunes App store, you can: track what you want to regift, take a shot of it, record who gave it to you, when and for what gift occasion, make notes on who NOT to give it to, categorise it, and then mark it off as “regifted” once you’ve rewrapped it and sent it on its merry way.

Just to make extra sure your regifting effort goes um, unnoticed, it even prompts you to check for receipts, engravings, cards or some other identifying factor that would indicate it had been originally given to you.

Perhaps this is one app that all couples should add to their wedding gift registry…

It’s becoming increasingly common for couples to request cash, not gifts, for their wedding present.

But many guests feel a bit squeamish about handing over cash and many worry that it’s just going to be spent frivolously.

In 1996, the US Federal Housing Administration encourage lenders to offer bridal registry accounts where couples could stash away cash from family and friends towards a loan for their first home.

SunTrust Mortgage, a subsidiary of SunTrust Bank was one lender which created a wedding registry, where guests would make a deposit and the company would notify the bride and groom to let them know. It is such a practical way to help them get a loan together, that it’s surprising that more banks haven’t got in on the act.

A credit union in Los Angeles, Water and Power Community Credit Union (WPCCU) has just launched the MatriMoney wedding registry savings account to help couples get over the (deposit) threshold. They get gift instruction cards to include with their wedding invitations and gift-givers receive acknowledgement cards of their cash gifts once deposited.

Unlike any other wedding gift registry, WPCCU also offers free online financial webinars for newly engaged couples to learn how to budget and manage their money.

I think this could particularly appeal to couples where at least one of them is a security-conscious, long-term planner Taurus, Cancer, Virgo or Capricorn!

It’s In The Stars is seeking a new couple to Be the Face of LoveStars for 2010: could it be you and your partner?

You could win a $AUD500 gift card to spend at your favourite retailer, or one of 5 x BabyStars boxed gift certificates worth $109 each to redeem for your own BabyStars report or to give your favourite new parent for their new baby or as a unique christening gift.

LoveStars reports make ideal personalised gifts for an anniversary, birthday, engagement, Valentine’s Day or wedding and yes, you will need to have one of your own (or borrow a friend’s LoveStars report) to take part.

Set up your camera timer so you can take a great shot of you and your partner enjoying reading your LoveStars report - maybe you’re wearing your wedding outfit, curled up on the sofa, or in a hammock!

For your chance to win, you’ll need to email at least one shot in low resolution (72dpi) and high resolution (300dpi).

Click here for more details. Competition closes 31 March 2010.

Too many people complain that manners have gone out the window but one crafty (and seemingly thoughtful) way to get them to send you (and others) a thank you card for their anniversary, birthday, christening, Christmas, engagement, housewarming, new baby or wedding gift is creating personalised stamps with their faces on them! 

Get a sweet shot of their littlest member to join the family, of the couple looking super glamorous or maybe it’s your favourite one of yourself that was taken years ago when you weighed less and had more hair. Who cares!

You can order them from Royal Mail in the UK from just GBP7.58 for 10 stamps, from Australia Post for $AUD24.00 for 20 stamps and from Zazzle for the United States Postal Services from $US18.95 for 20 stamps.

You can now even put your logo in there so a sheet of these could be a great gift idea for a friend or family member who’s just begun their own company!

Thinking of giving money to a charity? You might be better off donating directly.

The sheer cost of administering a gift card program means very few charities produce their own specific gift card. Many of them do have an online facility for you to donate straight to their website and even produce  an electronic receipt and thank you message that you can enclose in your birthday Christmas/ engagement/ wedding card for whomever you’re buying it.

America’s largest non-profit organisation, United Way sells gift cards, while Goodwill has stores across the states, but no national gift card program.

There are four major organisations in the US which let you pick your own charity - Charity Choice, JustGive.org, Network for Good and Tisbest. If you decide to use one of these Big Four, keep in mind that:

* some of your donation gets chipped away in administration and transaction fees

* not all organisations transfer the monies to their charities right away; some pay quarterly

* they don’t last indefinitely: Network for Good’s gift cards expire within 6 months.

* only you, as the gift-card-giver, get the tax break - not the recipient who actually selects the charity

Gift card prices range from $1.49 for Tisbest to $5 for the three others. Charity Choice has 100 charities while Network for Good lists an astonishing 1.8 million charities (who knew there were that many?). Network for Good includes its handling fee within its $5 purchase fee but admin costs range from 3% for card-processing for JustGive to Charity Choice’s $1.85 transaction fee per card, 5% admin fee and 3% credit card transaction fee.

Now that our credit card bills are about to arrive(!), January is a great month to have that discussion about money, spending, saving and issues such as gift-giving with your partner. On Friday 22 January there will be a very helpful Venus trine Saturn aspect.

Venus rules love, money and possessions aka gifts, while Saturn rules responsibility, thriftiness, planning and caution. When these guys make a beautiful trine, it is the PERFECT time to discuss gift-giving and a workaround that will please both parties.

Saturn is the Headmaster of the zodiac on a good day and so he treats everything as a lesson or exam to be mastered.

“Gift-giving is incredibly important to me as it lets me show my love and appreciation for others. You would rather save the money for our future.” Discuss.

Alrighty then. On 22 January, why not tackle the gift-giving issue in alphabetical order.

1. Anniversary gifts. Unless you’re a newlywed, most couples stop giving each other traditional anniversary gifts after the first three years and then prefer to go away for the weekend (which, ironically, is more expensive). If it’s not your first, second or third, and it’s not a big milestone like a 10th, 15th, 20th or whatever, perhaps you can agree to have a nice dinner instead. (Obviously you want to agree on this so you can be around to discuss anniversary gift-giving all over again next year.)

2. Birthday gifts. I realised that I’ll be buying a minimum of 19 birthday gifts per year which frankly horrified even me so if you have a partner (and he makes you buy all the gifts for his family, too), you could be up for a lot of gifts.  First make a list of each person you like to give at least one birthday gift to. Multiply that by a modest $50 to get your total. Once you’ve picked yourself off the floor, you may want to put a couple of rules in place. Perhaps you give only gifts to those friends you see at least once a month, and send cards to those you see less often. Or you replace gifts for friends with dinner at your home? Keep in mind that birthdays are the gift occasion where people are most likely to give personalised gifts so it’s worth planning ahead when there’s a special promotion on and to put away ahead of their birthday.

3. Christening gifts. These won’t happen every year thank goodness but you might decide to give gifts only if you live in the same city or base it on your closeness to the child.

4.  Christmas gifts. The Big Kahuna. For your own family you might discuss replacing what you spend on Christmas gifts with the equivalent on a family holiday, or lots of little things for one big-ticket item. Buying gifts only when they’re on sale. Or doing a Kris Kringle. Or setting up a Chrisco account. Or perhaps having a garage sale or selling stuff on eBay to finance Christmas gifts ie you don’t use your savings.

5. Engagement gifts. Again, these won’t happen every year but the woman will get engaged faster if she’s Generation X.

6. Fathers Day gifts. Can you take both Dads out to lunch on the same day to make a family affair and make that the gift? If you have to cut back on gifts somewhere, Father’s Day is the gift-giving occasion least likely to upset your father.

7. Mothers Day gifts. Hmmm, a lot more fuss is necessary here… She is your mum, after all.

8. New baby gifts. Work colleagues spend less per person when they contribute to a group gift whereas family and friends spend more on new baby gifts! Perhaps what gifts the new mother really needs are not cute hanging mobiles…

9. Valentines Day gifts. Will you feel upset if he overlooks it? What was your favourite Valentines Day gift? Did you get what you really wanted? Would you want it again? What about taking a raincheck for the following weekend when the flowers and chocolates/jewellery/lingerie/perfume boxed sets are reduced?

10. Wedding gifts. Again, weddings don’t necessarily happen every year although I did have three in six weeks one year. Are you going to faithfully stick to their registry or will you give them something that is very “them” but not listed? You do have up to one year to give them a wedding gift - at which point you can start the discussion all over again.